How to Lead from Within: Cultivating Self-Connection
By Kaila Pilecki, Inspired Results Group Associate Coach & Facilitator
This week, we’re focusing on Connection, and specifically on our connection to self.
These uncertain times continue. Most of us are leading virtually, through video and phone calls; directing our teams and listening to both their wins and challenges.
Being brave and showing up as a curious leader starts from one place: within. Let’s explore ways to connect with ourselves, to get clear on what makes us feel happy, grounded and calm regardless of the weather.
“You are the sky. Everything else – it’s just the weather.”
― Pema Chödrön
Put down your armour
Constantly working online is difficult for our minds and bodies. When you feel your patience thinning and exhaustion setting in, it’s time for a break. Seems logical, right? But when we’re being honest with ourselves, sometimes we defer to pushing through, working harder and being right. I’ll stop after I answer just one more email and finish this tiny task...
Where can you create space to rest and reconnect with yourself, without guilt or shame? Where can you put down your armour (however that shows up: perfection, controlling, all-knowing, competitive) in favour of being a brave, courageous leader?
Read more about Brené Brown’s concept of armoured leadership here. When do you armour up?
Take a break
Now that your armour is off and you’ve acknowledged that a pause is in order, here are some of my favourite ways to take a break throughout my work day:
Set a timer for 30 minutes and stop using devices during that time
Connect with someone who makes you feel seen, heard and understood. Let them know how special they are, and show up for them.
Move your body - get outside, stretch or move to a different area of your house
Sit quietly. Some of my favourite meditations are those by our Associate Coach Nicole McLellan. You can access those here. I also subscribe to the Hay House Guided Medtiations podcast because I enjoy the variety of voices.
Make a list of 5 things/people for which you are grateful.
Have fun
The global pandemic is causing a very serious and restricted energy to pulse through the world. Using your conventional thinking, you may find that we are somewhat limited in the fun department these days. May I suggest it’s time to get out of the box? Here are some ideas:
Make gourmet pop tarts (with or without kids!): View the recipe here.
Watch a silly movie, or a bad rom com; Dirty Dancing, Hitch and When Harry Met Sally are on Netflix. :)
Kick a soccer ball around the park and stop for ice cream on the way home.
Reconnect with a friend: organize a walk-and-talk by calling a friend while you take a walk around your neighborhood.
What’s possible if you let yourself relax and have fun?
Align with your values
In the Courageous Leadership framework, Diane speaks about connection to self by aligning with our personal values. Consider how you make decisions, what’s important to you, where you will or will not compromise.
Go ahead and review a list of values from Brené Brown’s here. Identify your top 5 values at this moment. They may be slightly different than usual, or even more pronounced.
What do each of the words mean, in the context of your life, your family and your leadership?
How can you lean on your values to ease the burden of decision making?
When you know which way you’re going, it’s easier to chart your path.
Treat yourself
Maybe there’s a book you’ve been eyeing that you can order on your e-book device. Or maybe you order pizza on Friday. Or maybe you take a bath when the kids are finally asleep. Think about something that would feel like a little luxury.
Ok, now do it. :)
At IRG, we are committed to holding ourselves and our clients capable by supporting our network with the Courageous Leadership framework.
Over to you: What are you doing to reconnect with yourself, your values and your sense of grounded calm? Share examples of how you (or others) are connected and courageous in your leadership by commenting below or shooting us a quick email.