Are you part of the appreciation deficit?

I was mortified when I heard Brené share the statistic from Eric Mosley’s new book (Making Work Human, 2020) that in a recent study 58% of employees said they never received thanks from their boss.  Are you kidding me? Saying thank you is the easiest thing for a manager to do, and yet clearly it isn’t easy for many.  What do you think is going on for these managers that they aren’t able to recognize and appreciate the people around them with a simple gesture of thank you? 

In our February IR Learning Lab Masterclass we explored the topic of LOVE and Leadership from two perspectives. My blog earlier this month focused on the topic of Self-Love and this week I want to shine the light on this deficit of appreciation that seemingly exists in many organizational cultures.  

Let’s start by defining the difference between three gestures that we all crave from our managers; recognition, appreciation and acknowledgement.  

RECOGNITION is about celebrating people for their contributions, tasks, projects or performance in some form that is connected to the business mission or department role. We know that recognition needs to happen in ways that work for individuals; for example not everyone wants to be recognized publicly and put in the spotlight in large events. Recognizing people for the small and bigger tasks should definitely be something you are intentional about as a manager. In the book The 5 Languages of Appreciation the authors quote a Globoforce employee recognition survey where 51% of managers say they recognize employees regularly, but only 17% of employees who work for those managers say their manager shows recognition for work well done. Clearly, there are some blind spots we need to shine the light on.  

APPRECIATION is different than recognition because you are motivated by a feeling of gratitude for the person you are appreciating, and there is some inherent value they bring to you or the team because of who they are and how they contribute. I like to think of appreciation as a way to help someone see how their work is contributing to a successful outcome, or that the way they approached a project was creative and successful because of their unique talents. Again, this needs to be navigated and expressed in ways that work for the person on the receiving end of your appreciation, which may or may not be in a public setting. I personally enjoy sharing appreciation one-on-one or in a small team setting.  

And finally, the gold in this category is when you offer ACKNOWLEDGMENT to someone. Sharing an acknowledgment of the person’s strengths, or how their values show up or a unique aspect of their personality will make a person feel truly seen and deeply valued for who they are. As a coach, I use acknowledgment often as a way to let my client know that they are seen for who they are and that even if the topic we are navigating is challenging them, I see them working hard, or their values shining through and this lets them know that I believe in them – for simply being who they are.   

So I have a challenge for you – will you set an intention to be a leader who appreciates and acknowledges more often? Within the Inspired Results Group community of learning leaders, we are committing to a practice of appreciating 3 people per week for the rest of February (and then hopefully beyond!) to spread the energy of appreciation through our workplaces and create a ripple effect of positive and inspired people.  We are in the midst of the most challenging time in our personal and professional lives, and we can lift each other up with more love in our leadership when we are willing to take a moment and share some appreciation.  

Are you in? Will you join us in this movement of appreciation?  

If you are looking for a community of leaders who are committed to brave and loving leadership then Join us here!